Sandwich spread

Pag konti lang ang palaman at pilit mo pang pinapahid sa napaka lapad na tinapay, madalas ang kalalabasan, WALANG LASA.


Minsan, tyempong ganyan ang baon ko nung elementary, ga-hangin na palaman, lasang tinapay lang, malungkot, busog ka pero di ka masaya.


Eto siguro ang ibig sabihin ng “spreading yourself too thin.”


Oo, ganito ako gumamit ng analogy, kelangan sa pagkain. Di halatang masiba ako at ngayo’y nananaba.


Balik tayo sa topic. Un nga, feeling ko ang buhay ko ay walang lasang sandwich. Lahat gusto kong gawin. Lahat ng bagay at tao ay gusto kong bigyan ng oras. Sa huli, bitin ka na, lugi pa sila.


Sa lahat ng sinubukan kong matutunan, walang nagtutuloy-tuloy. Gitara, piano, drawing, mandarin, MS (masters), etc.


Jack of all trades, master of none kung baga.


Dati may plano kami ni bespren na humanap ng magagawa for “self-development.”


Asan na nga ba si self-development?


WALA.


Nagising nalang ako at napagtanto na napag iiwanan na ako ng biyahe. Kung baga, bumababa na ang market value ko (choz). Well, tumataas man ang posisyon sa trabaho, pero hindi nmn kasi dun umiikot ang buhay. At malay nyo ba kasi din sa trabaho ko, kahit iexplain ko hindi nyo maapreciate.


Sa ngayon, sinusubukan kong balikan ang mga nasimulan.


Kumuha na ako ulit ng Mandarin tutor. Magagamit ko din naman ito sa trabaho. Sayang lang ung mga natutunan ko dati na tuluyan nang naglaho.


Pag aaralan ko din kung anong pwedeng maging business. Ayaw kong tumanda na empleyado pa din. Sayang naman ang mga naipon ko kung gagastos nanamn ako ng kung ano ano. I vow to spend on investments. Tama na ang active income, hahanap nako ng passive income.


Saka nalang ang magarang sasakyan, di ko namn kelngan pumorma, sakit lang sa ulo un.


Eto nalang muna priorities ko.


Self/ Life development.


Para magkalasa ang sandwich ko. At para maging yummy din ang sandwich, maggym na ako.


Para maging ala club-house sandwich. Na may umbrella toothpick.

WAPAK!

Time

A friend and I were chatting the other day and maturity was somehow brought up.


My friend likes younger mature men, “Maturity has nothing to do with age,” she said defensively.



“True,” I agreed, “Maturity has nothing to do with age, but it may have something to do with time and how you spend it.”

“But age is time, so what are you getting at?” queried my friend.

“You may be old, but spent all your years for useless endeavours, on the other hand, you can be young but have maximized all of your time to be most productive.”

Then I explained my weird logic.


We have 24 hrs in a day. Our usual routine would include sleeping 6-8 hrs of them. We work for another 8 hrs. We take a bath and dress up for another hour and maybe another if you’re the type who showers twice or more in a day.


We spend eating for 3 hrs (including breakfast, lunch, dinner and maybe snacks in between).


That’s a total of 21 hours spent already, leaving us 3 hours on average for all sorts of stuff that we can choose to spend our time on.


So how do we spend our 3 hours?


Of course with our (modern) busy world, we try to squeeze in experiencing life and learning from it with all our activities.


You may use your allotted 3 hours of eating time with friends, chatting and learning from each other.

Of course if you use your 8 hours of work for other than, well, work, that may be a bad thing.


We sleep 8 hours a day. Thus, we’re asleep for 122 days cumulative, which is one third of our year already wherein we’re prolly dead to the world.


And the other two thirds?


Well, I hate math, so I do hope you get my drift.


We learn from life, but in reality, have little time to learn from it.

Whether we spend it with family, friends, work or maybe even alone, it depends really on our priorities.


I’ve recently realized that I gave most of my time to work, little to my friends and less than little for loved ones.


Do I feel like I’ve missed out on life?


Yes.


I feel stagnant at times. Growing mosquito larvae for dengue like an animal farm.


With no specific development. With little bonding time with the ones who deserve it most.


Again, what has time gotta do with maturity?


It lies on where you allot your time.


Do you spend it on unessesary socializing other then being with a friend in need, or attending your son’s recital?


Do you spend it more on spending and less on thinking of other sources to increase your spending power, a business perhaps?

Do you spend it learning about the new gossip rather than on more valuable knowledge, maybe world events like what happened in Japan? Remember, great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, small people talk about other people.

So this is why I hate wasting time. This is why I hate being late and hate late comers equally.


Because you might never know, it may already be too late to even do things right. And I never really liked regrets.


For today we execute, tomorrow we plan, while yesterday can never be undone.


For it is with these little time of ours that we use to grow up and grow old gracefully.


So feel young, but think old.


Because time, after all, is gold.


(wala lang, nag rhyme eh, walang pakialamanan)

The other brother

I have three brothers. One from my mom (about to turn 18) and two more from my dad (and my current madrasta), ages 14 and 13.

Yes, they’re all my half brothers. But I never really used the term unless needed to specify parental connections. For me, they’re simply my brothers, with no additional labels.

I was able to watch the younger two grow up. I love them dearly and would have to constantly check myself from spoiling them. My fun times in the house are usually spent horsing around with them crazy two.

But the eldest one? We haven’t really met. He was but a mere rumor when I was just a kid. People would tell me that I have a younger brother ten years my junior. I have never really confirmed his existence until I was able to reestablish connections with my mom and lola. You see, even my mom was a stranger, just a face in pictures, up until I found the courage to send a business card before my college graduation.

I’d sometimes catch myself wondering what our first meeting would be like. Both my mom and my brother. But I’m more concerned about how it would be like with my brother. Should I start with, “hey, wuzzup?” or maybe a “dude (sabay tango ng ulo pataas baba).”

We’ve tried chatting, but mostly just due to my mom’s coaxing whenever she want to get updates, like when Ondoy came, or even because of that crazy email about radioactive rain from Japan. But our chats and SMS would never really transcend beyond, “kamusta-ok-lang” statements.

Recently, we’ve added each other up in Facebook thru my mom’s prodding. She wants to see pictures, she says.

But my unease nowadays stemmed up from their announcement that they’ll be coming home after my brother’s graduation in the US, just right after summer.

A friend of mine was right in labeling me a “pleaser.” For my brother, my first thoughts were on how to make him like me, which was kind of bizarre if you ask me. I mean, I’m the older one right? I shouldn’t be the one seeking approval. But I guess the pressure came from him striking me as this typical amboy teenager with an “I don’t care” outlook towards things.

So aside from that assumption, what do I know about him?

He’ll be graduating this year and be starting college with a 4-year scholarship grant. The plan is to continue on to med school afterwards.

So yeah, he has what I’ve dreamt of having for myself. The luxury of pursuing med school without having to worry about where to get the tuition fee payment for the next semester, or if I even can continue on to the next sem. Sure, I had breezed through high school on scholarship, even some years in UP, but med school is different. I chose not to pursue it with the birth of my second brother. My dad was struggling as it was already.

So now, I hope that I don’t rant about all that emo shit once I get to meet my mom.

How my brother is so privileged! With a Pontiac GTO 5.7 two door sports car, really cool toys, an Android phone while in High School (I got my first philips savvy during college, a hand-me-down from a graduating fraternity brother) etc. etc. etc.

No. I am not jealous. Or maybe just a tiny little bit. Just a bit. Really.

But seriously, I am happy for him, he did grow up to be such a responsible kid. And I’m equally happy that I never got the things that he has. I know that I would never be able to handle that, given my natural spoiled bratty self. I would’ve grown up a snob.

But regardless of how our lives differ, I really do wish that we’d somehow get a long.

That we’d easily hit it off and find that bond as brothers despite the 18 years of not knowing each other.

And I hope that somehow, the cliché on “blood is thicker that water” is applicable to our situation.

That calling each other brothers isn’t all about labels and legal documents, but more of being brothers in all aspect of the word. Not just by DNA matches, nor facebook family labels.

So to you my brother, be ready to meet kuya.

Sana handa ka sa topak nya.

Baka bigla kang magtaka kung related nga tayo.  Hahaha!

(image from here)

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P.S. I have just discovered that my brother has kinect. waaaa! I want one too! lech! hmmp! :P

Weekend/ random updates

Mag update lang ako. buhay pa naman. Sobrang busy lang pero may social life pa namn kahit pano.


This weekend was the best for me. Walang pending na reports, lahat for correction nalang, antay antay lang, lahat ng reimbursements ko naaapprove, so mababayaran ko na credit card ko wahahaha!


at dahil hindi ako nag bukas ng laptop para magcheck ng emails... nag jamming nalang ako kasama ng mga kapatid.

Salamat din pala kay Kath sa Tag, try ko gawin talaga. Minsan lang din namn ako matag so bibigyan ko tlga ng oras. haha! Basta, wait lang kath ha. :P

Note: Ung video sa baba, trip lang naming magkakapatid. Pasensya na, sabog lang tlga kami kumanta. haha! mababago ang pananaw mo sa buhay


 pag pinanood mo yung video. baka bigla kang magpakamatay. Watch at your own risk. aalisin ko din agad within 12hrs. :P


Nga pala, I need a new apartment within Makati. Any recommendations? paemail naman. tenchu!

(video removed kasi nakakahiya na pala, sa fb nyo nalang tingnan)